Mom Part 4

After the peace came the hard stuff, one thing after another. We finally had a positive pregnancy test. We thought this was our big turn around point. I guess we were wrong if you look at circumstantial events. A week later we had our first miscarriage.

I must say I never felt pregnant. I felt pregnant with Cap before you could even take a pregnancy test. I just knew in my insides. So when we got a positive test, I was a little shocked. So we didn't mourn the lost of a child with this miscarriage. 

We just hurt. We cried. We kept walking. We sang. We gave it to God and kept moving. 

We didn't blame God. We didn't think He "needed an unborn baby" in heaven either. His will is not death, it is LIFE.  

A month later came another positive home test. This time I took the test knowing it would be positive. A week after that, the doctor pregnancy test was negative. We were pretty confused. We didn't know this at the time but you can still have pregnancy hormones in you for up to 6 weeks, giving you false positives. It was hard to believe though. 

We just kept waiting. And waiting. Until finally, I could prove that I was in fact pregnant. This time with a cute little picture of an almost 8 week old baby in my belly. 

I will say, not having full proof made the month go by much faster than with El Cap during those weeks. We are excited beyond words about our growing family. I so enjoyed my pregnancy with Cap and it is the same so far with this one. I really do LOVE this part in my role as a mother. 

So we are a little over halfway and due at the end of June. We didn't find out the sex but are excited for the surprise! 

Sorry for not calling everyone we know. Very hard to do. I hope you understand. This "Mom Series" was supposed to be done by Christmas! Ha! I will move on in post subject now!